A strong network gives us strength and support, and not just in business, but in life. We build our tribe to help us get through the ups and downs.

So what happens when the people we need the most aren’t there? Because let’s face it, no one can lift you up or let you down quite like best friends and family.

Joining us in this episode of Think Tank of Three is a global leader and fellow podcaster, Cameo King, to talk about how to build relationships and what to do when you get burned.

Transcript

Julie Holton:
A strong network gives us strength and support, and I’m not just talking business, I’m talking life. We build our tribe to help us get through the ups and downs. So what happens when the people we need the most aren’t there? Because let’s face it, no one can lift you up or let you down quite like best friends and family.

Audrea Fink:
You’ve made it this far in your career. What is something holding you back from getting to the top? We’re ditching the culture of competitiveness. We’re women working together to help other women. We are think tank of three. I’m Audrea, your business development coach.

[SHOW OPEN]

Julie Holton:
Welcome to Think Tank of Three. I’m Julie Holton here with Audrea Fink. Today we’re talking about the power of building relationships and what to do when you get burned. Audrea, I don’t know if anything stings quite as badly as being burned by the people we love.

Audrea Fink:
And not only does it hurt to get burned by the people you love, but it hurts to like, be neglected by the people you love.

Julie Holton:
Yes!

Audrea Fink:
You need something, you ask for help and they’re like, nah, crickets.

Julie Holton:
Yeah. Our guest today is going to help us dive deeper into the good, the bad, and the radio silence, the ugly. Some of you will recognize her from her own podcast called Good Girl Radio, Cameo King. Thank you so much for joining us.

Cameo King:
I’m so excited to be here, guys!

Julie Holton:
Not as excited as us. We are fan girls for sure. We were just talking about one of your episodes. The tagline on your podcast is confessions about our flaws, faith, femininity, and culture. And you, Cameo, you hold nothing back on your podcast.

Cameo King:
It took me a while to get there because I asked myself like, why did you decide to do this when you don’t like to share much about yourself? It definitely, it’s been a journey. It’s been a healing journey and it’s been a journey and becoming who I’m supposed to be, you know, bold, you know, standing up for who I am and being my full self in every space that I enter. So it’s great. It’s fun. It’s, it’s a journey. I’m glad you guys are along for this journey.

Julie Holton:
Yeah. It takes courage to be vulnerable. Can you talk, like how do you do it? How do you open yourself up to be so vulnerable and in such a public way?

Cameo King:
I think you do it scared. I mean honestly, like you do it shaking, you do it nervous, you do it. And that’s why I think courage is present because we do these things. We know we’re called to do, we do these things that really bring us satisfaction, but oftentimes we do it with fear in our heart and then after it’s done, it’s like, oh, it was worth it. Sometimes. Sometimes You feel like it’s worth it. Other times you feel like you’re lying naked in the middle of the street because you just bared your soul to the world. Or maybe when you meet someone out who listens to your podcast and they remind you of something you said and you’re just like, oh my gosh, you know a part of my heart, you know? And so you kind of clutch your pearls a little bit, but it does take strength and courage and being vulnerable. But like you said Julie, like there is strength in that because you’re literally opening yourself up to the world and sometimes some of your most sensitive parts and that kind of gives people an opening to, to hurt you. Kind of what you guys talked about in the beginning and you kind of just, you got to stand in that.

Audrea Fink:
One of the things that I think has been really terrifying for us and having this podcast has been like, what will other people think of us? And so what we found, surprisingly for me, not maybe surprisingly to everyone, has been that people who we don’t really know well or people we don’t know are listening to the podcast will come up and talk to us and say like, hey, this was really valuable or I really love this. And so we found that a lot of that vulnerability has actually helped us with our own tribe, like with our own group of people. Right?

Cameo King:
And what I, what I found too is I deal with that a lot. You know, what is so and so going to think about this or what is a certain part of my community going to think about me when I share this. But what has happened is that I realize, and we touched on it is that their strength and vulnerability, but honestly that most people really don’t care. You know, they don’t care! They don’t care as much as we think that they care. People have their own lives, they have their own issues. They’re, you know, battling their own, you know, demons, they’re, you know, trying to move towards their own dreams. And so they just don’t care as much as we think that they care. Because when we flip the script, when someone else’s vulnerable, we’re like, wow, that’s so like we are in a sense in awe and we’re attracted to it and we applaud them and we say you’re courageous. When the shoe is on the other foot were like, wait a minute, wait, you’re going to know too much about me.

Julie Holton:
And that is so true. What’s that saying? Like we walked into the room and we worry everyone’s going to judge us. Like all eyes are on us and we’re all worried about what people are going to think when really the other people in the room are worrying about the same thing. Like they’re thinking that everyone’s focused on them. So when really none of us care and none of us are judging.

Cameo King:
Not at all, at least, I will say, at least the right ones.

Julie Holton:
The people who matter. How’s that?

Cameo King:
Because if you’re judging then you have other issues going on, things that you need to handle, you know yourselves. I mean, and we are all past a certain age and so we dealt with some things and we understand in a sense the weight of life and when you have life happening oftentimes what somebody else thinks goes out the window or you’re not focused on if you know Sue or if Keisha or Pam walks into the room and you know she doesn’t have on the right color. We could care less.

Audrea Fink:
So part of I think what allows us to be vulnerable at times is having that tribe that supports you right? When it’s hard or having a group of people who say like it doesn’t matter if you kind of look like a hot mess. So how did you build your network of support? Like how did you build up your tribe?

Cameo King:
I almost want to say that in the beginning it’s been organic. It really has in terms of, and I’ll say intentionally organic moment. But when I say intentionally organic, it’s just like you are attracted to the people you’re attracted to and it’s because you guys have the same mission. Maybe you have similar spirits, maybe you want the same things out of life, you have the same values. And so that’s how I believe I’ve built my tribe. And then even on top of that, as you begin to build, or as I began to build relationships, I understood what was valuable to me and what people were pouring into me. And it’s, you know, because I’ve benefited so greatly, I’m like, oh, I need to do that for you. Or how can I help you out? And then it just, honestly, it just brought me joy because we’re giving and receiving and giving and receiving.

Cameo King:
And that’s probably one of the best relationships, but also where there is deep trust. And so maybe I begin to trust you with this small portion of this project. And then I begin to trust you with the larger portion of this project. And then I begin to trust you with, you know, just other parts of my life and other parts of my, maybe even my heart when situations arise and you just feel comfortable, oftentimes you just feel like a connection because even, you know, we had dinner, it was kind of like a girl’s talk dinner last night and we were literally Julie and a couple other ladies, we were just sharing in it. And in that moment, I don’t know if we knew what was happening and it’s only been less than 24 hours, but maybe in five years when we look back over that, we were actually building a relationship. We were building a network because trust was happening because we were sharing parts of our heart because I trusted you for whatever reason, maybe because our bellies were full.

Julie Holton:
That lovely martini I had helped us.

Cameo King:
Exactly! We had a little bit of liquid courage, you know, you never know. You never know what’s in the mix, but there was still something there. And that’s when I say it was intentionally organic. So yes, it was organic that we got together and people decided to be a part. But why did you know Julie decide to be a part of some of the work that I do? You know, with the Grit, Glam, and Guts with the teen empowerment movement. There’s a reason behind all of that and that’s that kind of intentional organic phrase that I’m now going to coin and put it on a tee shirt. I don’t know.

Julie Holton:
Well, and I love your word intentional because like you, Cameo, are very intentional and you use that word a lot because you are very specific about these relationships you’ve built and not that there’s an agenda. In fact, the first time we sat down to coffee, it had taken us over a year to actually like sit down for coffee because our schedules are crazy and whatever other excuses we came up with. Cameo and I actually both were honored with an achievement in the city of Lansing for being named 10 over the next 10. So, 10 leaders who are going to accomplish great things over the next 10 years.

Julie Holton:
And it took us a year after winning that award to have coffee together and we sat down and had a great time and suddenly Cameo’s like so do we have an agenda for today? Like was there a reason having got together and I joke about it, but it was like, you know what? There was no agenda by the time we left. We had, because just in our nature we had a whole to do list of what we’re going to accomplish together. But I love coming back to your keyword of being intentional. I love that. Like you said, you are organically seeking out whether it’s energy, attracting other energy or people with similar goals and you know, walking in a similar space in life. We can do our best to be intentional about putting the right people in our lives, but without fail, we’re going to have someone who just maybe is just vibing with the wrong energy or brings maybe a level of toxicity that we’re not looking for. They’re just in a different space in their life. Sometimes I know for me I end up in a place where I feel borderline like I’m being used or the other person has an agenda. So how do you Cameo start to set those boundaries for when someone is just not the right fit for where you are in your life? Because that’s hard.

Cameo King:
It is. It is hard. There’s so many dynamics to that. And I would like to say that once you set your boundaries or want to continue to move towards your goals, people will naturally just fall off. I don’t know if that’s true, but it makes sense though because honestly if I’m focused on building a apple tree and you’re focused on building a sandcastle, we’re eventually going to go into two separate directions. And so when we talk about our goals and our values, it’s just not going to mesh well. And I would like to believe again, you know, organically we are going to fall apart and it doesn’t have to be that intentional. Boom. I’m not going to talk to you anymore. Boom. I’m not going to hang out with you anymore. I’m not going to go out with you anymore. Because what I don’t want to happen is at the same time I don’t want the same type of thinkers around me either.

Cameo King:
You know, because then you get caught in your little bubble and think that everything you say and you do is right and your way of thinking is just perfect because you and your five friends all think the same. I try not to cut people off I guess in that way. But like you said Julie, reinforcing and being competent in your boundaries is so key and I think it’s challenging depending on your personality, depending on who you are. Especially being a hard working woman, something that was shared last night. We tend to, I don’t want to say look at people as projects, but it’s like if we just put some more work into this relationship, then it’ll work out. If I just figure out how to work with them or if I figure out their quirks or if I figure out, you know how we can work together, we can make this happen because we work hard and we make stuff happen.

Julie Holton:
And we don’t want to give up on people either.

Cameo King:
Right.

Julie Holton:
We’re not quitters, we’re going to keep fighting until we fix it.

Audrea Fink:
Like professional women, it’s professional to make this work, right? So the fact that we don’t agree or we don’t get along doesn’t matter cause I am a professional and therefore I will make these things happen and you get to a certain point where you’re like, this isn’t working! How much more of my effort am I going to put into this? And like for the name of not being a quitter, in the name of not being seen as unprofessional or in the name of, you know, compassion.

Cameo King:
Oh my gosh, when you said that, that’s it in the name of compassion because that’s the one thing. So this is my little confession. That’s the one thing that I feel like I fall back on often times like, oh, well I have to love this person through this because that’s what you’re supposed to do.

Cameo King:
Especially, you know, I’m a woman of faith and so especially when people don’t, I put the air quotes up, act the way that you want them to act or because they don’t function in your world like you want them to function, but we have to ask ourselves, what does that really look like? What does loving someone through this process look like? Because oftentimes what we do as hardworking women, we do it at the detriment to ourselves. You know, our career, our mental space, our social and emotional health, our goals, our values because we’re loving them. And I think again like we have to reinforce those boundaries and ask ourselves one, why do we have those boundaries and what’s most important in this space when we’re trying to love someone or when someone doesn’t fit?

Audrea Fink:
I have a friend who says on a regular basis when we talk, what is the thing that we need to do that is the most kind for this person? Which really flips the narrative a lot because it’s not what is the best thing for the business? What is the best thing for the bottom line, right? What is the kindest next step for this person? And a lot of times the kindest next step for the person is to call them out on their behavior in a way that is not shameful, in a way that is not like adding drama or conflict. A lot of times it’s the kindest thing you can do for a person who’s not working with you is to say this isn’t working and here’s why. These are the things that aren’t working.

Audrea Fink:
So we had a vendor at work and this is, you know, not your tribe, but at the same time, right? It’s within this personal space. We had a vendor who like just wasn’t hitting the deliverables and we realized that we were really frustrated, they were frustrated. There’s a lot of communication mishaps and it came down to the kindest thing we can do for them instead of just continuing to be frustrated, was to break down where we thought they were adding value and where we thought they were spending our money, where we could do it ourselves and it would be cheaper. And they were nickeling and diming us over here. And instead of saying you’re nickeling and diming us on this bill, what we said was, here are the things where we really see your value and here are the things where we don’t need you to charge us this much money. And that completely reshaped the conversation. So now instead of saying how we don’t like this vendor, we said this is how we work with you. This is the way to help you help us and continue working with us.

Cameo King:
Yeah. And I feel like trust, I think we mentioned trust earlier, but how trust gives way to those deeper relationships. And I think that trust component is, I’m trusting you to tell me the truth as well about myself. And that’s what happens there. But I think sometimes it can be such a challenge to tell the truth to people that we value the relationship with. You know, I’m not even thinking about the baggage we bring along, like if we’ve been rejected, that’s a whole nother conversation. But you know, especially if I value the relationship with Julie, if I value the relationship with Audrea, I may tip toe around how to tell you the truth. Because experience may have taught me that once I tell you the truth, an unfavorable truth, I’ll say that, then you back up or you reject me because of what I shared. Even, because the idea is that if I tell you, and I use this jokingly, but if I tell you you have a booger in your nose, you know you may not necessarily like me, but the reality is I’m trying to save you from, you know, you’re about to do a speech in front of 5 million people you know, on YouTube and you have a booger in your nose.

Julie Holton:
And you better tell me. Like, and that’s the thing too is these conversations are not easy. These are difficult conversations but you know what the key is, you know what’s even harder than having the conversation? Not having the conversation. Because in the long run you stand to lose that friendship. You lose the relationship with the vendor like you, and for you personally. I’ll speak for myself, it builds. I wake up thinking about it, I start to argue with myself in my head. I start to have these conversations over and over, and then if I would have actually just had that difficult conversation, I could let it go, a long time ago. And that is also kindness for ourselves. Like Audrea, you talked about what is the kindest thing that we can do for that other person? Well, how many of us women need to flip that script and look at ourselves and say, are we being kind to ourselves? What are we doing to protect ourselves in this relationship? How are we helping ourselves through this difficult time or how are we confronting? Sometimes there is a confrontation. How are we confronting whatever it is that we need to be confronting? Because we need to be kind to ourselves.

Cameo King:
That is so good because as you’re saying this, I feel a slight, just a slight teensy weensy bit of conviction that I need to go and talk to somebody because. Because I mean that’s what it is because you, cause what it is is I’m holding something in my heart and it’s taking up my heart space, it’s taking up my head space. When I wake up, I’m thinking about it because I don’t want to have this difficult conversation or I don’t know how to have, and that’s, you know, maybe we can begin to share that too, but how to have these difficult conversations in a sense where it’s off of our chest. Where we say it with kindness and we let you know in a straightforward manner and very frankly these are your actions or these are your behaviors. Not necessarily attacking the person or their character, but the facts.

Cameo King:
Like this is your behavior, this is how your behavior makes me feel. Or this is the end result of your behavior as it relates to my life. Or how we are in relationship with each other, or how we engage. And so that being kind to yourself is like by far that’s something I’m working through in terms of putting myself in my feelings first because often times putting my feelings first, you feel as though you’re disregarding somebody else’s feelings. Because in this moment, again, another confession, but I think I’m battling with is like, oh, well Cameo, you’re going to hurt their feelings. You’re going to make them second guess themselves, or maybe they need some support right now. Maybe they’re going through something right now, but as I know, Cameo, put yourself first and get this off your chest.

Audrea Fink:
So there’s this book called crucial conversations. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it, but it talks about how to have these really hard, awkward, uncomfortable conversations. And one of the reasons that we don’t have them is because they’re hard. But one of the great things about having really hard conversations is the more you have them, the easier it gets to have them because it’s sort of like exposure therapy, right? You, you do it enough times that you start to lose the fear of it. And I think that one of the things we as women in professional settings need to learn how to do and then also as humans in our interpersonal lives and relationships, is to really be courageous, right? Take that courage and step outside of our fear and say, this is an important conversation because there are two people in this relationship or in this interaction who need something.

Audrea Fink:
I need something for sure and putting myself second isn’t working for me and this other person needs something because it’s not fair for them if they’re not getting the truth from me, right? Or clarity from me. The thing I struggle with most and like trying to put into practice the principles of this book is what if I hurt their feelings and I think it was there, I can’t think of her name, she’s the master coach, but she has this book where she talks about like what other people feel and how other people think is none of your damn business. Should be kind, you should be considerate, but like how they feel that’s theirs. If you go to someone with compassion, with kindness and with the intention of managing a conflict and they’re upset, that’s none of your damn business.

Cameo King:
Mm-hmm (affirmative). It’s so funny. I’m literally looking for this quote, but I am going to paraphrase it. So if I butcher it, it’s okay. But it was from, I read the Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes, but she said something like on the other side of difficult conversations, I think it’s freedom. I think that’s what she said. And getting to that freedom, like that’s a part of the reason why I do what I do, why I have these confessions on the Good Girl podcast and why I love having these conversations with women and even with young girls, it’s because I know that to be true. Like that is a truth for me that yes I may be quote unquote dreading the conversation, but I know on the other side of that conversation it’s something much greater and it’s the freedom to we know, show up as my full self one in that relationship because that’s the truth.

Cameo King:
Like even past that, that I’m not showing up as my full self in that relationship because I’m not being honest about how I’m feeling. You know, even if it’s a professional relationship, I’m not telling you that you, your job isn’t satisfying my needs in terms of whatever order or whatever vendor you guys are talking about. But I guess I didn’t realize as I’m growing just how the conversations would become more difficult. I mean I know that makes sense but I just didn’t realize it. You know, maybe in my arrogance as a young person that you just think, oh these difficult conversations, I’ll have them anytime, anywhere with anyone. No. It just seems like sometimes the weight becomes heavier when you have to have difficult conversations maybe with your mother, with your, cousin or– and depending on the topic, how do you have the conversation potentially with, a family member about their behavior with their children. When something real is at stake and we’re not talking about hurt feelings, we’re talking about lives, we’re talking about your health, we’re talking about you could lose your job, like all these different things. And the difficulty changes I know as we get older, but still that fact still stands on the other side of these difficult conversations truly lies freedom.

Julie Holton:
Well, and here’s the reality of that is those conversations become more difficult when we care about people more. So when it comes to our family, when it comes to our best friends, especially when we feel like that support is lacking or we’ve got something big going on. Cameo, we talked about this, a big project, a big business launch, we’ve got something that we’re really investing our and soul in and the person who matters most or the people who matter most, are not there. And that is what hurts the most. But I think that’s also what makes that the most difficult situation to really be having those conversations. Bringing this all back to building this tribe, I think that’s where it becomes the most important. One thing that I’ve learned, you know, we’re big advocates of therapy on this podcast and one thing that I’ve learned through my own therapy throughout my life is sometimes we have to find the right place for people in our lives. We talked, you talked earlier Cameo about like we can’t just cut everybody out. We can’t just go live on the mountaintop, by ourselves.

Cameo King:
Why not? Why not?

Julie Holton:
And every time a difficult situation comes up, we can’t be like, oh I’m done. Which is what like if you follow all the memes on Facebook, that’s what the advice would have you do. You can’t do that. That’s not going to work. We have to find the right place for people in our lives. Especially we can’t ignore a bad boss. We can’t just stop talking to a bad coworker. We’re in that situation and we need to figure out the best way to deal with it. What we can do is find the right place for these people in our lives. We can limit our interactions. We don’t have to hang out with that coworker or that boss outside of work. And even with our family, we can reset our expectations so that no matter what, we are still in that healthy place. But Cameo, this is hard. Like these conversations and you call them conversations of truth. There’s a lot of fear in that. How do we tell the people that we need that we need them? Or do we tell them?

Cameo King:
I think we do because that respects the relationship and that also holds them accountable and it holds me accountable to my feelings and it gives them an opportunity to grow and an opportunity to respond to how I feel. Because idea too is that you respect me, that you trust me and that you love me in this relationship. And if I tell you I have a problem with something or if I tell you I have a need, then the expectation is that you will address my concern. Maybe you can’t meet my needs, but bare minimum you will address my concern. I think we have to, I think it’s twofold. Because we’re growing in this process too, but ask ourselves, do we truly need that person or what void in a sense do we feel like that they’re feeling? Why do I need my best friend present? Why do I need my mom present? Why do I need my cousins present at my events? What does that mean to me when they are there or when they aren’t there? And in a sense is that really detrimental to my health, my business or whatever it is that we expect them to be there?

Cameo King:
And so one, I think it’s important to self-assess to make sure that we aren’t putting undue expectations on our loved ones. But when they can’t be there I think, Julie, this is something you said, whatever we need, we’ll be present when we need it. It may not show up as that person, but it will be present when we need it. For example, every year, I’m just surprised at the amount of support and in a sense family that’s built around the Grit, Glam, and Guts conference for teen girls.

Julie Holton:
We’ve mentioned Grit, Glam, and Gets a couple times. Yeah. Tell our listeners about this amazing organization that you’ve started and what this does for teen girls in Michigan.

Cameo King:
Oh, cool. So, Grit, Glam, and Guts it is a teen empowerment movement for girls ages 12 to 17 and we focus on everything from courage to leadership, authenticity, self-determination, and solidarity. And so all of our programs are rooted in that. And one of our flagship events is a statewide teen conference, and we had it this year on MSU’s campus and we had almost, I think 200 people come out.

Julie Holton:
It is pretty amazing.

Cameo King:
Yes!

Julie Holton:
Pretty amazing. And the theme, You Are Enough. I still have that stuck in my head because as women we need to remind ourselves of this. But as teen girls, I mean my gosh, if we would have been learning these same things that we’re talking about on our podcast when we were teen girls, it’s a pretty incredible empowerment movement, Cameo. It really is.

Cameo King:
Yeah. Even to hear, it’s so funny because earlier I was sharing with one of my friends, I said just things that we struggle with as women, so to hear you say that to me means a lot to me. And it’s not that I don’t think that the movement is powerful. It’s not that I don’t see the things that are happening, but it’s like it’s so much further that or some so many other things that I want to do and so much growth that needs to happen. Sometimes I forget what’s happening right in front of me. No Cameo, this is great. This is dope.

Julie Holton:
These are lives changed, Cameo. I mean I even said that. So I had the amazing opportunity, I felt so blessed to work with you, cameo. I coordinated the media coverage and I sent the media notes afterwards to say, because of you, lives were changed. These girls were on live TV and the major TV markets across the state of Michigan and they were pouring out their hearts. They were inviting other teen girls to join them in solidarity and sisterhood. It’s really such an amazing movement.

Cameo King:
Yeah, so when I say Grit, Glam, and Guts, that’s one piece I’ll say of the greatness that happens with Grit, Glam, and Guts. But what happens behind the scenes is you also have amazing women like Julie, like Tanisha, like Dominique coming together. And like MSU, ARCA coming together to put this on and they’re pouring out not only their skill and their expertise, but literally their wisdom that you cannot put a price tag on that they learned over the years. And all of that is coming together on behalf of girls we don’t even know. We’re praying for these girls, we’re loving on these girls. And all of that is coming together. So when we talk about the network, when I talk about people showing up that you need, but maybe not the people you think should show up, but they really are the people that should show up. That’s what happens. And again, that’s when you’re just like walking on facts like, okay, I believe I’m called to this work. This is what I’m supposed to do. And boom, a Julie shows up, or boom a Julie inboxes you.

Cameo King:
So, when you think you need somebody in that space and this, this doesn’t mean the person that you need, it doesn’t mean that they’re no good or anything like that, or that they still don’t hold value in your life. But it’s kind of reevaluating what did you really need from that person. It’s not maybe that exchange or that skill, but you maybe want something else from that person. Maybe you want some love or maybe there’s something else that needs to be repaired or needs to be reconciled.

Julie Holton:
Cameo, you are a shining example of when you pour out good into this world, the universe responds. God responds and you get good in return. Cameo King of Grit, Glam, and Guts and Good Girl Radio, thank you so much for joining us today. But you’re not off the hook yet. Before we go, we are collecting advice from successful women in our communities and we’re sharing it in our think tank forum. So we have three rapid fire questions for you. All right, number one, is there a lesson that you’ve recently learned that you wish you would’ve learned earlier in your career?

Cameo King:
Yes, definitely. And I’m feeling like I’m, I’m still learning it, but it’s the idea of believing myself over others. And that’s in everything. It’s kind of rooted in, I only know what my soul needs and what my soul wants. So it’s when other people give you advice, well meaning well to do good intentions and that advice worked for them and their situation. And we may have similar situations, but the advice doesn’t work for me. And I have something on my heart that I believe is best for me in this situation. But what happened for Cameo at least I lean to their advice. I should have believed myself. I should have listened to myself. And so that is a lesson that I’m learning and I wish I would’ve learned earlier in my life because now it’s no stopping me. I hope I don’t become this big tyrant.

Julie Holton:
What advice would you offer to your younger self? Say maybe 10 years ago.

Cameo King:
A rap song comes to mind.

Julie Holton:
You going to rap for us?

Cameo King:
No, not my ministry.

Audrea Fink:
But I mean you have to disclose the rap song now.

Cameo King:
I’ll say the gist of the song is, and it’s kind of in line with your other question, but the gist of the song is like, go hard for what you want and disregard everyone else. Not to say don’t care about people’s feelings and things like that, but go hard. Put yourself first. Go hard for what you want. You guys may be able to translate those into some curse words, but it’s really like fo hard for yourself. Put yourself first. I’m not to say that you don’t care about anyone else, but you have to be your own advocate. You have to stand up for yourself like no one is going to come save you. You are going to save you.

Julie Holton:
What is the most important skill for a woman in today’s professional setting?

Cameo King:
I don’t know if it’s a skill that she can develop per se because what I want to say is to be believed. So when I say that I believe this is the best approach for this business. Believe me when I say that and I’ve proven it. I’m not just saying, cause what happens is women are oftentimes second guessed and it’s not approved of until a man comes in and says this is a good idea. So when I say, let’s do a little bit more research on this company, believe me. When I say I don’t know about this or I do know about this, believe me. And so I don’t know if that’s a skill that really I can develop, but like, believe me when I say what I say.

Julie Holton:
I love that. Audrea recently blogged about the power of persuasion and that would be the one skill she would say. And whether that ties into what you’re saying Cameo, with the power of persuasion, having that authority, having that oomph, whatever you want to call it. Yeah, I love that. Cameo King, thank you so much for joining us today. What is the best way for our listeners to connect with you?

Cameo King:
I’m on all social media. I’m on Instagram at CameoTheKing. You can also catch us on the Good Girl Podcast on Instagram. I’m on Twitter and I’m on Facebook. So yeah, just reach out to me. I’m friendly. I don’t bite. Love to meet new people and thanks for having me. I love this conversation guys.

Julie Holton:
It was great. So connect with Cameo and The Think Tank of Three online at thinktankofthree.com., You can also find us on social media by joining our private group on Facebook or join us on Instagram. Join us on Twitter. If you liked what you heard in this podcast, please share it. You can find the podcast on iTunes, on Spotify, Stitcher, and SoundCloud. Basically, you can find us and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts. If you have any questions or if you have any topics you want us to discuss, send us a message at thinktankofthree@gmail.com.